Graduation

I'm pretty sure we're all aware that this is the season for graduation; people graduating from preschool, elementary, middle, high school, and college. But sometimes these are not the only kind of graduation we experience, sometimes we have people who are "graduating" or moving on from a certain stages of life. That also can be considered as a great achievement :)
Anyway, I went to my little brother's graduation yesterday. I've never been so proud. He won every awards possible. This is the same kid that literally raised hell in school; on the school bus; with teachers; got suspended so many times. I guess you shouldn't judge them as they act because kids like that are the most misunderstood.
He was really excited to be done with elementary school...I guess it has to do with the whole 'big kid' syndrome :)
Anyway, it was nice being there...I felt like a kid again and a very proud sister :)

Standing tall

At some point in our life, we learn how to stand tall no matter the situation; and we also learn the ability to make it on our own. Most people are so depend on a certain thing or person, that when the thing is not there, it leaves them shattered and clueless.
The truth to the matter is that we don't really need to be dependent on someone else in order to find our self worth. People are always going to leave you at some point, but until we learn to carry on on our own,we just might keep falling...

Randomness

It's funny how it takes something bad or close to that description to happen before our eyes finally open about something we've been doing wrong for a long time now. I literally had an epiphany today; I've been having trouble with a certain thing in my life and I always tend to look at in one perspective; but today I realized I need to think out of the box - stop trying to figure out what I did wrong and try to fix it.
I mean it's no freaking brain surgery if you do something repeatedly and it yields the same result repeatedly, then it's probably time for you to try a new way.
I'm hoping this would work out just fine...or else I'll be very disappointed. I just might weep.

hmmmn...all that made a whole lotta sense in my head....not so much outside. well at least I know what the heck I'm talking about...

Are you ready?

A few days ago I learned about the deaths of two former classmates of mine.I guess every bone in my body took it the hard way because I was freaked out and very devastated. It's just really sad when young people die. It makes you wonder what is so important about you that you're still living and it sort of helps you set your priorities straight. It is true that we are all going to die someday and to be quite honest, I'm not afraid of death...I'm just more afraid of the people I'd leave behind when I'm gone.
An extreme paranoia tends to come over me when people around me starts dropping dead like fishes. I find myself in this state of negativity; I start feeling like something bad is going to happen to me. I hate this thoughts and sometimes I can't help myself...I know this is the devils way of instilling fear in me, but I'm not going to let myself succumb to his stupid tactics because I know my God has not given me the spirit of fear!
I guess the one question left to ask yourself is, would you be ready when the Lord comes for you?
Don't live your life in fear...make everything in your world right, so that when the time comes, you'd have nothing to worry about, but a very joyous expectation of living and dining with the king of kings :)

Boxes of memories

Today I took it upon myself to clean my room and sort of rearrange some books on my shelf. Beneath my reading table, I have at least three shoe boxes worth of mails. It contains every mail I've ever received or maybe the ones I deemed worthy of saving. I guess you can call it my mails memorabilia :)
I never realized how much memory of mine this three boxes holds: I had everything from high school, travels, college and miscellaneous things in it. There were greeting cards people gave to me and reading it again sort of brought tears to my eyes. I had letters from a poetry company congratulating me for being the winner of their poetry contest. I found my high school graduation invitation/ thank you cards...which by the way, I never mailed out...and I wonder why a lot of people never showed up at my graduation :)
Anyway, I've held on to so many things but it's time to let some of those things go. I would really hate to fall a victim of hoarding.

Believe in yourself

Feeling neglected is one of the worst feelings in the word..well at least to me. Sometimes it just feels like nothing is happening at all: as the whole world is in stand still or moving in a slow motion. sometimes I find myself thinking that this world doesn't exist. People say don't watch your dreams pass you by, but what if there was no dreams at all? What if you once had a dream, but people kept telling you, "you'll never make it as that person?". why can't people just believe in one another, help each other build a life full of fulfilled dreams. Instead of degrading one another.Anyway, what I'm trying to say is that people should be watchful of what they say. I don't know about you, but I'm sick and tired of people always getting nervous over what I want to do. If I do it and it doesn't work out, I'll know at least that I tried, but if you keep making me feel like I'm worth nothing, then I just might end up living my life with regrets. And I don't want to be that kind of person.

Losing my way

These days it seems like I've been out of touch with my own life; I've let people and things distract me from the goals I've originally planned for myself. It feels like I've succumbed to the pit of laziness. The fire I had in me at the very beginning has been put out by something much greater than I can imagine; but I know there's nothing I can't conquer if I really work towards it.
I'm going to set a goal for myself...just one goal and I'm going to work towards that goal for the rest of this year. I know it would work because I've done this before.
I'm just sick of being this person I am now...I never used to be like this; I had goals and dreams of who I wanted to be and where I wanted to go. Now all those things are clouded with unambitious imagines and road blocks.
From here onward, I'm reinventing myself to be a better person. I'm ready to conquer every road block and I'm ready to find my way and become that person I used to be - or rather, someone much better!

Forever doesn't exist

Sometimes there are things that happen to you that makes you curious as to why is this or that so....I've just been thinking of some stuff like:
1) What is "forever"?
when it comes to relationship or friendship, people say or tell each other, "I want to be with you forever; we're going to be together forever etc.... whereas I personally think nothing lasts forever. of course this is just my opinion and everyone else have their own opinion of what "forever" is. People always end up either leaving or changing and that at the same time changes our view of what forever is or should be.
I think instead of promising to be there forever, lets just say "I'll be there for you as long as I can or live"..yeah yeah it's almost the same thing as saying, "I'll be there for you forever" but at the same time there's a difference to it; you are promising to be there for the person as long as possible..not forever because "forever" doesn't exist!
2) Friends that use friends:
I might be late in the game to noticing this, but some people preferably called "friends" only call, text, or remember you when they need you to do them a favor. When things are going all good and peachy, you don't exist in their world until everything goes sour then all of a sudden bam! there they are calling your phone; and you're sitting right there wondering, "why in the world is she calling me?" So I have decided that those "friends" that call me whenever they need a favor would never and I repeat never get it! that's a promise....

Let it all out.

There is a point in life when you realize what is right and what is wrong for oneself; such realization gives you a sense of freedom. The point is, there are things that we shouldn't allow to be a boundary in our life because those things would always pull down along with them.

There are people out there who become friends with you because they need something from you. I guess you can call them the "takers and never-givers" kind of friends. I would simply refer to them as acquaintances because I know they're not to be relied on. I was literally called a bad friend because I refused to do something for one of my acquaintance; the one that never calls me in random timing to say hello or whatever. If they only calling you or talking to you when they need something, then they're probably not your friend. I say ERASE them from your book of friends!
`
There is nothing more I hate than liars...I swear they freaking irk me! They say it doesn't hurt to say the truth, well I think that's a lie to some point because you need to remember the "truth hurts"...and people do tend to get over pain as time progresses.
Okay that wasn't what I had in mind to say...the point I'm trying to make is that people lie about the most stupid[est] stuff...things I could care less about. And the worst part of it all is that they're unable to stick to the same story when you ask them hours later. Why??? because they're freaking lying and when you tell a lie, you have to keep on telling lies upon lies until your behind finally get caught!

Since it feels like I'm in the mood of venting, then I should probably state that I hate when people pull my legs...literally. People don't seem to realize I'm capable of doing a lot of thins, which might come as a total surprise to them. I'm like a chameleon, my colors changes according to the situations I find myself in.
I don't take things too seriously and sometimes I might expect the other person not to also...because somethings aren't worth the headache or the drama; and I just happen to hate both things.

Happy Loner

I am a self-proclaimed loner and what most people don't seem to understand is that I chose to be this way, and that my parents didn't cause it to happen. People seem to think that because my parent don't give me much freedom for a social life that it has caused me to grow apart from the social crowd. While that might hold a little truth as much as Santa clause being real, it is not the reason why I think I'm a loner. A lot of people regard loners as "psychos, weirdos, lonely people..etc" and I don't see myself as any of those stereotype. If you look on the positive side, being a "loner" is actually about finding solace in other things such as books, music, movies, internet rather than with people.
I've always been a shy person right since I was a child and most of the time I kept to myself, but that didn't mean I was lonely or depressed.
Another stereotype that people cast on being alone is that loners have difficulty making friends. Well I'll gladly say that I make friend pretty easily and I associate with other groups of people whenever I feel like it. So y'all hypocrites can stop stereotyping people just because they like/want to be alone!

"The Christian Life"

I'm a Christian... at least I consider myself as one. But the big thick question is 'am I a good Christian?'... First of all, who and what exactly is a good Christian? If I had to describe a good Christian, it would go something like this: he/she is a person after God's heart, he/she believes in God and His existence, prays and reads the Bible everyday, and worship in His (God) name. Now back to the question, I guess I can consider myself somewhat of a good Christian. I believe in God Almighty and His existence, and I pray and read my Bible "occasionally"....now this is something I'm not proud of. Sometimes I set up a goal for myself concerning my faith in God [and also Bible reading and prayer], but at some point I tend to fall off of that train of determination. I know it's all the work of the devil, but I've been praying to God to give me the self-discipline to fight this battle. I want to get to know my Lord more often than I do right now.

Scream

When I start listening to a certain song [mostly sad songs] over and over again then something is probably wrong. Well, at this very moment, I am beyond stressed out. I'm stressed to the point of wanting to rip my head apart. But for some reason, the music calms me down for awhile. I wish I could scream in this quiet library...the silence is driving me insane. you see what I mean? ohmygoodness! I'm losing my freaking mind!
Unfortunately, school is not the only thing stressing me out; the entire world is stressing me out. I just want to go to some place where nobody knows who I am...I just want to go away for awhile.

The Replacement

There is a popular belief that boys come and go like seasons but it's also true when it comes to relationships and friendship. I strictly believe that the worst feeling in the world is realizing that you meant absolutely nothing a certain someone; they only needed needed you for that particular season of their life.
I understand the fact that we're all human and sometimes our behaviors are irrational; that is, majority of the time, we don't realize a certain action of ours is hurting the people we really care about.
We all like to feel special, liked or loved by someone [ I don't mean to the point of extreme dependency...that can be scary] I mean just knowing that someone cares about you is enough to bring joy to your heart. Nobody likes to be replaced...mostly by someone you used to, once upon a time dislike!

The Prideful Hearts

There is a little pride lying within each and every one of us; some people would admit it while most are more likely to deny it. What would you call that thing that stops you from apologizing to someone, when indeed; you know you were wrong about a certain thing? What do you call the tendency to look the other way because we can’t welcome the thought of being the weak one? The answer is one word: PRIDE. You have it, I have it, and we all have it in us.
Pride is like the disease we cannot cure; it eats our insides slowly and painfully until we're no more. So many things and people have been lost because a particular person refused to step up. I understand no one wants to be the bad guy, but really, is it worth losing a loved one over?
People that are too proud tend to have a huge ego to go along with it because everyone knows pride and ego go hand in hand. The truth is, nobody likes and egomaniac...well I don't; I find them extremely annoying.
And just so no one misunderstands what I'm trying to say, there is another kind of pride, which is considered "a good pride." For example, taking pride in what you do and the people you love is a whole different issue; and that I would consider the good pride.
During the past two weeks, I've been caught up in some sort of "drama" and misunderstanding with someone very special to me. At first, I convinced myself that I wouldn't be the weak one. That was my pride speaking, but I was able to break away from that type of mentality and realize that precious moments are being eaten away. So what if you're the bad guy? who cares? at least you know your conscience is clean. C'mon people, get over yourself and do the right thing.

Masked Men

"We wear the mask that grins and lies, It hides our cheeks and shades our eyes,-- This debt we pay to human guile; With torn and bleeding hearts we smile, And mouth with myriad subtleties." Paul Laurence Dunbar

This poem speaks nothing but the truth concerning human nature; we tend to portray a different image of our-self to the world because we don't want to be judged.
We smile when really, all we want to do is cry or just scream.
We say 'yes' when what we really mean is 'no.'
We allow people to control or determine what goes on in our life, rather than telling them to back off.
We pretend to love someone just because you'd really hate to break their heart or make them cry.
There are so many things we do that in a normal circumstance, we'd rather not do.
So what is life really?....a bunch of Lies?

Purity Rings

For show or for real?
Teens nowadays need to realize that purity rings are not worn barely to make a fashion statement. It is supposed to represent something much bigger than that; something that has to do with the implication of the name “purity.”
I came to know about purity rings 4-5 years ago during one of the summer camps held at my church. Most of the kids there pledged to practice abstinence until marriage. And I was one of them. We were all offered a purity ring as a reminder of our promise to ourselves and God. The belief was that from there henceforth, we were married to God and our body belonged to him. I had absolutely no problem with that and to be quite honest I was traumatized with the idea of being sexually intimate with anyone lolol.. Anyway, a few years later, I misplaced my purity ring. It didn’t change the fact that I too the pledge and I didn’t feel like I needed a ring to remind me.
Okay I seem to have lost track of what I was saying; so now back to the subject. Some people tend to wear a purity ring just because they think it’s cute or to deceive others about their sexuality [in lack of a better word]. Well, you’re not deceiving anyone but yourself…was that a little harsh?...yes, no?...oh I don’t care =]
It doesn’t bring all the boys to the yard
One more thing I’ve noticed about purity rings is that it tends to scare people away; mostly the guys. When some guys go on their prowling business, they’re looking forward to catching the easy prey; the ones that are willing to have fun with them- sexually. But once they see that ring on your finger, they realize they have no chance with this one.
For all sexes:
In case you didn’t know this, purity ring aren’t meant for just female. There are men out there who wear them, while most of them don’t; but believe it or not, there are actually men out there who are willing to wait; who wouldn’t pressure you to do what you don’t want to do. I also believe that men aren’t the only one that puts pressure on the significant other; in most rare cases, women tend to pressure their partner into committing sexual acts. Don’t be fooled!
This is my purity ring….yes, I took it upon myself to replace the one I lost a few years ago, mainly for the fact that I like to scare all the boys away from my yard….hahaha.. Let's just say I'm not afraid to tell the world that I'm not sexually active and that I'm willing to wait!

I purposely chose to wear it on my ring finger :)

Pro-life or Pro-choice?

During my little breaks from reading “school” books, I like to enjoy something out of that description; anything that doesn’t cause me to fall in to the doom of boredom or frustration and mostly what does it for me sometimes is reading a good book from one of my favorite authors; James Patterson, but in this case, I had to ditch him for awhile after I received this small sized book from a group of activist at my school. The title of the book is WHY PRO-LIFE? Caring for the Unborn and Their Mothers by Randy Alcorn. At first, I was hesitant about reading the book because I felt that I already knew everything there is to know about abortions and I held strongly on my beliefs that abortion was wrong and should be condemned. And that’s quite the truth….The author’s viewpoint in the book is that abortion is murder.
The issue of abortion can create all sorts of powerful emotional feeling, but people need to know what they are really doing. Abortion is among one of the issues people feel strongly about, in fact, it ranks as number one.
Before I proceed to make my point, I would gladly state that I am all for Pro-life. I believe that every child deserves to born. The difference between a pro-life and a pro-choice believer is that a pro-life believe that “when a child is hurt by his mother it brings harm not only to the child but to her. It is impossible to separate a woman’s welfare from her child’s.” In other words, women never get over the trauma of losing a child.
So many questions arises when it comes to abortion: questions such as, when is a good time to abort a pregnancy?; Is abortion right when pregnancy is due to rape or incest? Is it right if the mother’s life is at risk? etc…If I had to answer those questions, I’d say there is never a good time to abort a pregnancy and people have the choice of putting up the child for adoption. Well that is just my opinion, so now let’s see what the book has to say concerning the unborn. Here are some few points I find very interesting while I was reading the book:

#1 “Early abortion”: “the human life begins begins at the time of conception…human life is present throughout this entire sequence from conception to adulthood…any interruption at any point throughout this time constitutes a termination of human life.”

#2 Who they are: at conception the unborn doesn’t appear human to us who are used to judging humanity by appearance….no matter how he or she looks, a child is a child. And, always, abortion terminates that child’s life. The question is not how old or big or smart or inconvenient the unborn are, but who they are. The answer is simple – they are human beings.

#3 Health issues …abortion for the sake of “health” would not be lifesaving but life-taking….pro-life does not mean being pro-life just about babies. It also means being pro-life about women.

#4 Rape or Incest: studies show that pregnancies due to rape are much rarer, as few as one in a thousand cases. Since conception doesn’t occur immediately after intercourse, pregnancy can be prevented in many rape cases by removing or washing away the semen before an ovum can be fertilized. (This is very different from using chemicals that can kill an already-conceived child.)
*The point is not how a child was conceived but that he was conceived. He is not a despicable “product of rape.” He is a unique and wonderful creation of God.

I’m afraid this is all I can say from the book…I suggest you get your hands on this book. It would blow your mind. It is not meant for only people who believe in Pro-life, so I suggest you pro-choice or undecided folks out there to read it. After reading it, then you’d realize I didn’t do the book any justice
“Abortion ends a human life. Every woman deserves better than abortion.”


What is your view on abortion? I think I’m up for a debate :
Love,
Doris